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Women over men paying on first date

Women seem to be less fussed on who should pay for a first date, and say money modesty is more attractive than looks.
Bianca Hartge-Hazelman
February 14, 2018

Which of the sexes should pay on a first date this Valentines Day? These days it seems women are less fussed on who pays, whereas men are left all the more confused.

A new survey has found that men, not women, believe it is still more important that they pay for a first date.

In fact only 36 per cent of women surveyed by industry super fund−owned bank, ME, said that it was important than men paid on a first date, compared to 41 per cent of men.

Historically it’s been seen as good manners if a man pays on a first date, but let’s be real here, it’s also reflected the fact that women have tended to earn less as well.

The survey which questioned 1000 people, also found that 42 per cent of women and 35 per cent of men said it was no longer important for a man to pay.

So where does that leave men this Valentines Day? If you’re worried, play it safe and pay for dinner, or just ask the question.

Meanwhile the same survey found that money modesty might be more attractive than looks this Valentines Day.

Think about it. You’re out on a dinner date and your special friend isn’t boasting about what cash they have or what they own, yet at the same time, they admit to being keen savers and like to be generous. #potentialkeeper #goodstart.

It’s these conversations we have around money that can often make or break a new relationship.

‘Good saving and spending habits’ is a quality that 62 per cent of women and 57 per cent of men said they rated as important when it comes to dating, romance and relationships, the survey found.

‘Good savings and spending habits’ was even rated as being more important than career prospects or a person’s total net worth of a date or partner.

ME Money Expert Matt Read said our preference for ‘sensible saving and spending habits’ in a partner makes perfect sense.

“Being part of a couple typically means working towards shared goals like buying a home, raising a family, and eventually, enjoying a decent retirement – aspirations that all hinge on responsible money management,” he said.

“In essence, it’s all about financial competence. Someone who knows how to get ahead in life and put their goals into action is an appealing trait given this can help motivate you to achieve your own life goals, whatever they may be.”

Money modesty outweighs sizzling good looks.

‘Showing off or boasting about money’ could be a sure way to kill any romantic appeal, according to ME’s findings.

Around 64 per cent reported ‘money modesty’ as important – even more than ‘physical appearance’ (61 per cent) when it comes to dating, romance and relationships.

However, romantic appeal also requires a balancing act. Around 54 per cent of women and 45 per cent of men also say it’s important that their date or partner is ‘not too tight with money’.

Remember nobody likes a boaster, but similarly nobody likes a scrooge.

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Bianca Hartge-Hazelman
February 14, 2018
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